Me

The greatest problem with feeling sick is it makes me self-centered.

What’s that pain, what’s my blood pressure now, did I take my pills, what’s my temperature now, when is my next appointment? It’s not a pity party but illness points inward and demands attention.

Considerate friends ask “How do you feel?” requires self-assessment and comparison to the last time we met.

When I feel good, just normal, there is everything and everyone else to pay attention to. Before waking up: What’s to do, where to go, what next? Then pets, family, chores, commuting, customers, focusing on the world out there. But when sick, discomfort is predominant. It’s a hurdle to surmount before casting attention on anything or anyone else.

A self-centered life is puny and shallow. Other than work, how do I get the spotlight off of infirmity?

1. Pray. There is nothing more humbling than sitting at the feet of the Creator of the universe and dwelling with Him. Yes, I drag all my complaints here, then leave them at the foot of the cross and recognize they are fleeting. “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.  For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:16
2. Read. Anything that is in front of me. Magazines, books, tablet. But a well-written book pulls you in and takes you there. My wife loves fiction but there is nothing like reading about history and biography from the people who were there and can give you the sights and sounds and smells of reality from their perspective.
3. TV. My Dad calls it the idiot box. After scrolling through 100 channels and settling on a movie I’ve seen twice I feel my IQ dwindling. Most programs are fast food for the mind. They distract but don’t satisfy.
4. Cook. It certainly takes thought, attention and a lot of action to create a meal. Before getting sick I used to do a lot of physical work as recreation but now I can at least stand and stir and clean and serve. Then nap.
5. Screen time. I started writing this entry at 4:00 AM. Then did the usual Facebook/News/Weather/Email mind-dump for an hour. Yes, the internet is a distraction but what a hole. I’ve just started playing Words with Friends with a few opponents. This isn’t your grandfather’s Scrabble but it’s a fun challenge. (What is a Qi?) Back to work.